Finally we came to rest! some sitting, some lying down.  But all of us a bit taken I think. Well, except the wolves who done this before, who only shrug their backs and was ready to pull out again. Luckily we didn´t. Instead we had a simple but good dinner. I felt a bit funny and wondered why. Well, I ate and drank especially a lot. I  also filled my backpack bottle with fresh water. After eating we rested a while. Mostly because we waited for our buses to be ready. Or more correct – the drivers. Finally we bordered  White, Blue and Red (our buses, name-coloured after the french flag) we found us places to sit. And sit we would! The second part of the first day was  a more or less non-stop travel from Sweden to Germany. Meaning what? Meaning we would sleep sitting in the bus! And not with much room to spare. Three buses and 150 travelers. Gives about… uhm… zero, space left… So we slept where we sat. Or didn´t sleep, or tried, or died… Ah no, not died. Except some backs…  But it would take hours before it would be time to sleep. so instead it was… Movie-time! you know, it is a fun part of deciding what movie to watch when you are fiftyish persons in the bus.  But eventually a movie came on. It was actually good. I saw two movies I´d probably never would have seen but liked. OK, there was a movie also I wished I hadn´t seen. Most of the time though I slept. I came to realize that I had become sunstruck! I felt ill, thirsty and  quite quesy in general. So I just sat in the bus hoping not to have to vomit in the bus…. I heard that there was a poor young girl that did so some days later.  She had a blanket in her knee where it all went though. I just stayed low and not many noticed at the time that I was ill. Doing a lot of sleeping during the later or the day made me sit awake most of the night instead. Great. I was the only awake in the bus. Well the driver, half a bus in front of me, also of course.

We traveled through Sweden to Helsingborg to ferry over to Denmark (Helsingör). In Denmark over to Rödby for a ferry over to Puttgarden, Germany. Last stop was the ferry ride where we visit the loo and brushed or teeth.  Finally back in seat and sleep to greet a new day in Germany. Day one closing.

Another matter that is less fun is the overall reason for my blog. The trip to China; or more correct, the supposed trip to China. A week ago I resieved a message from my “friend” whom I was to visit. The message was simply put – I´ve got other things to do, you can´t come. What??! It is only a month left (at that time) and you say “no”?? So, in one swift move I lost both a place to stay and my guide in this strange world. I felt there was only one thing to do. With deep sorrow in my heart I went the day after to my travel agent and returned the tickets.  Blast! I was so looking forward to this trip! But I just couldn´t afford living at a hotel for two weeks. And what would I do? I had nothing planned myself. And my friend? well, we haven´t spoken since then. And I guess we wont either. Net monetary loss for me is about 3.500 SEK. money spent for nothing. Like a three month Visa to China. Sometimes life makes you bitter.

One thing that will prevail yet is this simple blog though. I think I will try to write now and then about things that happen around and in me. If there is anything… Well, there is always but to see it is another matter.

The other thing that was an happy occasion in this was the feeling that I knew I could  afford buying this stuff. I didn´t have to think about what I could buy or not. That is a relief, I admit. The matter that is a challenge came when I got home.  All this micro-technique in all it´s splendor is OK and good. Things take very little space in your pack. Good! You fold them out and use them. Then you need to fold them back again. BAD! Who on earth (except those who made it) can pack it back together as nifty as it was in the first place??? Well, not me at least. But I have the good taste to try it now, before we leave, not standing in the middle of nowhere (or France..) desperately trying to fold my sleeping bag. Right now it lies behind me silently giggling away in wait for me to try the impossible…

I have fought the poncho (no problem), I have fought the cushion ( minor problem) and the floor cover (no problem). But to see the sleeping bag fold out of that tiny package sent shivers through my back.  How on earth to get it into, again?? That will have to wait a while… Feel I must gather some mental strength first…

Oh, well… Anything to make my day interesting is welcome – I think.

The second goal of our trip whas the old castle Stegeborg, that has been one of Swedens most important castles.  It controlled the waterway into one of Swedens most important cities at the time, Söderköping (you cant tell that today!).  To get to the simmering metropol of Söderköping you had to pass a passage called Slätbaken.  At its narrowest part there is a island. At the island rests the rest of  this castle.  This castle is brimmed with history and several kings have passe through  here. And it was here the plans for the famous banquet at Nyköping was drawn up, since it was here king Birger had his base.  The retribution from the killing of Erik and Valdemar (Birgers brothers) reaches its peak here when the castle is surrounded and finally falls.  The two main defenders (Birgers son and the knight Brunke) are captured, brought to Stockholm and killed. The place they are killed at is Brunkebergsåsen (“Mountain-hill of Brunke. I wonder how the place got its name…). Also the freedom fighter Nils Dacke was here. But he was not as lucky. His soldiers never conquered the castle.

The only way they knew at the time to block the waters at the island was to put big wooden poles in the water so that ships simply  got stuck.  At the north side of the island it was completely blocked while the south side contained a maze where ships – slowly – could pass. During a count nowadays archaeologists found that there is around 10.000 poles in the water here!

* Agape: Latin for “love”.

*Capella Ecumenica: “The ecumenic chapel”

Kolmården is also a huge forest living here. In the olden days it ways an insecure path path to this my hometown. Insecure, since in those past days, there where many highwaymen and bandits making home in these woods who attacked travelers they came upon. There is a lot of caverns in the area suspected to been homes to these wild men. The only sanctuary in the woods where a  monastery (Krokek, gone today) that took in and sheltered travelers. That sanctuary was a bliss for traveler of those days.  I think that this church function in similar way today.  Not that you risk getting assaulted by highwaymen nowadays. No, the assault is in the form of information, sounds and beings. We forget what it is to live in silence, and calmness. We stress and we rush on to the next something that we “must” aquire. Thus we forget ourselves and our inner peace. Actually many of us don´t even know what I am talking about at all… But that single spot of reverence and silence can be found inside a church and especially in the Church of  Stone.

The second thing Kolmården is know for is the Zoo here.  And that is a strange idea – to put a Zoo in the middle of a forest far from any city.  But A visionary man saw what could be done and did it.  Kolmården is also a small village. A village that lived and thrived in the marble-industry. In the -60 the industry declined to become a trickle.  But the idea of a Zoo was born though many though it impossible. Why a Zoo out here?? The main idea was, and still is, that it is odd to put animals in small cages in a city-based Zoo with too little space. Instead build a bigger one in the wilds and give the animals a bigger space so they actually have better living conditions. And so was done. The result is good and nice for evereyone (except maybe for those with poor fit of gust…).  To see those wonders of the creator walking relatively free is a wonder of it self. But it is also noisy, lots of people (mostly), smells, shops, restaurants all around. So when it all becomes too much for your mind; go visit the Church of Stones – it is there,  in the middle of the Zoo!

Yesterday I did something I will never do again.  I held responsibility for a class in school for a whole day.  I just can concede this; I am not fit to be a teacher. It was the most depressing thing to do.  I don´t envy our teachers of today! OK, I am not fit to be a teacher as I said; but that it would lead to a complete chaos (which I am sorry to say it did) is not only a result of my lack of skills. As a pupil said:  “He is too kind and can´t report us, so what does it matter what we do?”. That is a direct quote.  It is not easy being a teacher today…. The situation at our schools are tough. Not saying teachers are bad. But classes are big giving little time to help pupils. Materials are old and worn.  Some is directly incorrect. buildings are partially well used and worn. The learning rate at our schools are low. Many pupils feel lost and have little faith in their own future.

What does this have to do with anything? Besides that I am a lousy “teacher”. Well, in our fine town where we have good and kind politicians they have done there job and wisely decided the future of our schools.  In the whole of our town 80 jobs as teachers are to be vanquished.  In one school, all classes in year 7-9 is being moved to a bigger school in a another part of town. A small school with young children is threatened to be put down completely and the pupils moved to a big school thus getting  bigger. No one touched by this is happy about it. This will save the politicians 11 million SEK (as to what I heard last).  This money will be used to help other schools. The same city government decided earlier also to spend over 10 millon SEK to renovate a  functioning football arena so that the city in time may earn more money….

Why does it make our good nice politicians surprised if we in next election says as the raven; “nevermore!”…? At least I get the feeling they put the money before the childrens well being. I understand that we have a financial crisis here as in many other places. But why, oh, why start a big renovating project in a time like these then? to give work to building companies? Well, that may be needed, ok. But then again, to what cost? To increase the city income? Yes, but that will take time, wont help now. Why, why?

“Nevermore…”

I am no cheater, but sometimes I mayhaps take life a bit too serious instead. like two days ago at this meeting and at the end of the day. We were all tired and trying to finish as soon as possible. There was a subject we almost forgot and I was the unlucky one to remember it. And maybe dumb enough to mention it. I was drown in an unison “Noooo!!” from around the table, which wasn´t too fun. It happens I was one of the leaders of this little meeting and we had an idea about how to solve the matter quick for the moment. But noone gave me space to talk, and didn´t notice I was trying to explain, which was less fun. so i lost my temper, banged my fist in the table trice and yelled “shut up”. Wonder upon wonder! It became silent… After I explained my idea there was no protests, all agreed (or noone disagreed loud).  The meeting ended shortly after and all went home as happy as can be – not. But all went home anyway. 

Today I still wonder if I took that meeting too seriously and that it was a totally misfit too loose the temper like that or if I straightened out things so we resolved the meeting quicker than we would otherwise. The table (wich is not mine) is OK, my fist is ok and I suppose we still can work together. So whats to say? Right or wrong?  Well, I only know I have to live with the one I am and not to hide it, not even to myself.  No shortcut in life can change my temper. But without them, maybe I find more time to relax and see my good sides as well? I have to go through one day at the time and see the tasks each day brings seperately and at its proper time. I cant run away from a task just because I don´t like it or don´t know how to do it.  Again; don´t see the problem – find the solution.

Today I took a walk in the woods where I live. Following my habits I picked up trails
where most people don´t go (like the trail that got me stuck in a small bog -
in sandals). Following a trail over a sun-baked area I realized that this small
path was a ant-highway. A true autobahn of the ants. So as the kind soul I am
I decided to walk beside the path so I would not molest hundreds of ants on my
small journey. It became a little harder with all the brush in the area; but it
was worth it! Finally after a ways time of silent company I and my small
fellows parted way. I hopped over a ditch they didn´t want to cross so they
left. I went happily on and found myself  after a while strolling on a big
trail for joggers. Broad and even out. So there I walked like I owned the
world. Well, until I noticed a tiny movement in front of me. A small ant waving
and yelling  “watch out, watch…”. “Ah, ehm… sorry…” I noticed more ants in front of me, but suddenly it was a very big effort to avoid them. I couldn´t go staring into the
ground all the time while I was walking, could I? I would miss all the splendor
if the nature around me! But then again… Is one existence less valuable than
hundreds?

Sometimes I feel it is the same about us humans. We cherish our society but neglect the
single existences.  The poor and the lone ones who barely have food for
the day. It is easy to think of the good of your town, your country than those
living next door. Simply because it becomes more personal, too close. Why
wonder about a poor souls misery when it makes me feel miserable myself? Better
to salvage some coins to give to some help organization giving help far away.

The problem is, what do we do if we land in that mud-pod ourselves? Loose the job, the over-paid house burns down, or a child get a terrible disease (with an expensive treatment).
Suddenly we crave to get help from our government, neighbours, relatives or who
knows who… What if we, for once, did it the other way? Helped without being
asked, gave without feeling remorse? I don´t say we shouldn´t get that help.
Not at all! But maybe things would go smoother if we began when we could, not
when we must?

I freely admit; I am no super photographer,  I am happy when I get a good shot now and then. But I will try my best this time and hope to have some nice views to show you here. And thank you good programmers for creating programmes thet help you fix photos afterwards (don´t hit me Helen!). This one photo is rigged afterward in several ways but what does it matter? I have achieved what I wanted and I see it as a sort of art that too.